Performers

Cinco de Mayo & Melissa Lauren

Cinco de Lesbianas

Published on May 5, 2017

Cinco de Lesbianas

80 Photos + Video

We celebrate Cinco de Mayo every year — wildly. Perhaps we should mention that while we have nothing against holidays for other nations, we do not necessarily recognize them all with parties either.

In case you happen to be a little behind in your Mexican history, we should also probably tell you that officially Cinco de Mayo celebrates a specific Mexican army victory over the French … um … a long time ago. Granted, conquering the French hardly seems worthy of celebration, because that does seem to be the first thing one does when trying to take over the world, after all. Hey, read some history about the “world” wars. You can imagine all the enemy generals sitting in a room, saying, “OK. First thing we do is take over France.”

But maybe it was different a long time ago.

For our part, we celebrate Cinco de Mayo for a much more basic, and substantially less violent, reason: We really, really love Mexican food around here. In addition, we have well-developed palates for fine tequila. We can also count to five, which led us to our rather festive lesbian orgy on tap for this week’s end. As it turned out, at least a couple of our participants might even have some Mexican heritage. We cannot say for certain, as we did not ask any of them, that being not the important part of the Risqué Business festivities as we have explained.

For our purposes, Latin surnames worked just fine. We could, of course, have done some research on the issue, and we did actually begin that procedure. Without putting too fine of a point on it, let us just say that the “fine tequila” part of the day did result in limited interest in searching for adult star biographies on the internet. On the upside, we had zero difficulty watching the glee with which Devon, Melissa, Mya, Rebeca, and Jenaveve “toyed” with each other.

Seriously, you really should check out the new Samsung QLED series. We don’t get any kickbacks or royalties of any kind, but we probably should ask about it as much as we all brag about the thing. Suffice it to say that when you have more than a full foot of television screen for each of the five people participating in your Orgía Lesbiana, the experience can be quite memorable.

You should consider the option for your next Cinco de Mayo event, and now you know that this little diddy will be right here for you to pull up on your smart TV.

As an interesting aside, one altogether-too-interested-in-people.com individual in our office noted that a favorite celebrity partied yesterday with vegan Mexican food. Not to get too “broiled” in the controversy here, but that’s just weird. Not wishing to fuel the debate, however, we have chosen to leave this crazy person unnamed. We will tell you that had we liked it, we would have put a ring on it. As an even more interesting aside, we know that Melissa Lauren happens to be French. So there’s that.

Viva la Jalapeño!

[And for the record, Viva Devon, Melissa Lauren, Mya Nichole, Rebeca Linares, and Jenaveve Jolie. Ay, chihuahua!]